Dinner Guests

 Tonight we had Lee and Shalome over for dinner and we had such a good time. It was nice to just sit down and get to know them a bit better, even though Abe(he's 9months old) was a little fussy but it was just nice to hang out with them. They have 3 girls and 1 boy and our kids seemed to get along pretty good so hopefully it stays that way. I've figured out too that I really enjoy cooking and having people over for dinner, maybe that's my gift.....ok maybe not. Shalome and I were talking about possibly doing a Beth Moore study together and getting some other ladies involved with it too so I'm really hoping that it will work for us to do this because I can't tell you how much I miss my Beth Moore study. I just need to get involved in bible study again, I feel like I've been away from it for so long and I really need it. I mean I still do devotions and stuff on my own but I just like to have the discussions and get other peoples point of views. Anyway, that's all for now, later taters.

  So today as I was painting Peyton's room I was listening my ipod and I had all these older songs on there and they just took me back to those moments of who I was with and where I was and of course that got me thinking. What if we would have ended up with that certain guy/girl that we were with when that song brought back those memories, I hope that makes sense. I can't help but wonder how different my life would be if I would have ended up with the person that I thought I was going to, now don't get me wrong I am so happy with Lamar but if you know me at all this is just how my mind works. Anyway, I don't think I would be going on a church plant and I'd probably still be in Arthur and maybe with 15 kids.....haha ok maybe not. It's crazy to me how one decision can change your life forever, thank goodness I made the right decision. But really, your life could be completely different with one little decision, one decision..........think about that. I mean even if you turn right instead of left, you could have avoided an accident or you were 5 min late you could have avoided an accident. It is comforting to know that God is helping us with these decisions and of course, knows what's best for us. Obviously He knew what was best for me and I'm so glad that I decided to follow Him, even though at the time I didn't think He knew what He was doing ;) I'm sure I'm not the only one that's felt that way either. Like I said before I'm so happy that I married Lamar and I have no regrets and I'm pretty sure that it was one of the best decisions that I ever made.

  Day 2 of painting is finally done and I only have 2 more days left. I don't mind painting at all but I forget how exhausting it is, I could probably go to bed right now and sleep all night. I'm painting Peyton's room tomorrow and the good thing is that it's not as big, bad for Peyton but yay for me when I'm painting ;) Anyway, I've got nothing else to say I'm to tired to think, yes I'm lame I know. Have a fabulous night all and we'll chat tomorrow :)

Well today is much better then it was yesterday and it might have been because I actually had something to do, I painted the living room so that kept me busy all day.I'm hoping that by painting most of the house and putting my own touch on things that it will make me feel more like I'm home. I can't wait to see it when all the painting is finished and I'll have most of that done by next week and then I'll just need a few decor items and I'll be good to go.  I definitely need something to do during the week, even if it's just for a couple of days, plus the sun just needs to shine for more then 1 hour at a time that would just make me feel better too ;) I think sitting around at home gives me time to think way to much and I just let my mind go to places that I don't want it to go. I really need to get involved in a women's bible study so I will definitely be on the look out for one, either that or I'll just start one myself and hopefully I'll have lots of ladies that would be interested in joining me.
  I do have some other news to share and I'm so excited about it, I rain for 60min. straight today........aaaaagggghhhh I'm so so excited about it. I said that I wanted to be able to do that by the end of the week and I still have 2 days left. I know 60 min probably doesn't sound like much but I'm just proud of myself that I did it and I plan on keeping it up too :)

Loneliness

  Well today is just one of those days and maybe it's because it's so dark and dreary out and I am in need of some serious sun. I'm just feeling really lonely today so sorry for being a debbie downer but that's just where I'm at. I just hate this feeling, I don't think that I've actually ever experienced true loneliness until now. I've always been surrounded by my family and friends and now I'm not. Yeah I've made some new friends but we're not that close and yes, I have Lamar and the kids but still it's not the same as before. As I'm writing this it just makes me want to pack up everything and move back, of course I know I can't do that. I don't really miss living in Arthur at all but I just miss all my friends, I honestly didn't think it would be this hard for me. I guess I didn't realize how much I relied on everyone until now, now I get to rely on myself/God/Lamar, not that I didn't before I just have to rely on them a lot more now. I know that things will get better but right now, this is where I'm at and it just hurts. I just miss everyone so much and I miss the way things used to be and yes, I need to get over it and move on because this is where my life is now, it's here in Morton/Peoria and not in Arthur. I really am trying to be strong in this situation but sometimes I have to just have my moments and I know that's ok too, I just can't stay in those moments for too long.

    Well nothing to exciting has happened today, I had my first Stella & Dot party this morning and let's just say it didn't turn out well at all. No one bought anything or booked a party from me.....FAIL! I was a bit disappointed at first but then I got over it, there's nothing I can do so I just have to keep trying. I'm probably going to have a few short months with nothing going on but hopefully stuff will start happening with it soon. Anyway, after the party I went grocery shopping and I have to say that I really hate going to 3 different stores just to save money, yes I'm saving quite a bit of money but it's just a pain to have to do that. Oh well, at least all the stores are within 5 min. of each other instead of across town. Now I'm home and I plan on staying here tonight, I'm still trying to recover from the weekend so I'm pretty tired.

Another Good Weekend.

  We just got home from being in Arthur all weekend and yes it was a great weekend but seriously, it goes way to fast. I feel like when we go back we're running in about 10 different directions and we can't really relax, either that or the weekends just need to be longer so we won't feel so rushed. I was talking to Heidi on Saturday and I told her that if this is how our weekends are going to be(running around like crazy) then I'm just going to tell everyone that if they want to come and see us, then they have to come where we're staying, yeah I know that wouldn't work so well either.
  So last night I got a phone call from Lisa telling me that they are taking my mom to the ER because she's having symptons of a heart attack, of course I left as quick as I could. Which by the way, when I left Chad and Carolyn's at 11:30pm I set the alarm off.....awesome. I felt so bad because everyone was sleeping but of course they understood. Anyway, they haven't really found anything, she has to do a stress test tomorrow and hopefully they'll figure out what's going on. We did go to the hospital this afternoon before we came home and she did say that she's feeling a lot better so that's good.
  I do have to share one other thing with you, I was able to run for 45min. straight tonight, yes I know that might not seem like much but I was pretty happy with myself. I'm hoping by the end of the week that I'll be running for 60min.