Fasting & Faith

  Well the last 2 days have been super emotional for me, there's just so much going on right now and with us that we haven't been able to sell the house yet, well it's been a bit stressful. We also got an email from Ben H. about doing a 40 day fast, needless to say I was so not happy about getting this email. I told Lamar that I've been fasting something since January do I really need to fast more stuff. But then I was thinking, I've been fasting so far for 2 1/2 months and if you add on the 40 days it would be right about 4 months of me fasting something and I'm complaining about giving something up for 4 months and look at everything that God has given up for us and everything He's done for us. I feel like a total brat saying that I'm not fasting anything else, I've been doing it long enough. Well God definitely opened up my eyes on that one and He showed me how selfish I was being. Now I still am not exactly sure what I'll be fasting but I know that God will show me. I also went back and read my post from 2 days ago, the one about being disappointed, and of course God opened my eyes on that one too. Today has just been an eye opening day ;) Anyway, He basically asked me how often we have disappointed God, we disappoint Him every day and yet when one thing doesn't go our/my way then we cry, throw a fit and act like our whole is crashing down. Now granted, I was pretty sure that those people were going to buy our house and when they didn't it was very upsetting, but that also did not give me the right to act like I did. I told someone the other day that if God has asked us to pack up and move then why would He not allow our house to sell, I sounded like it's my right to have the house sell because God has asked us to do this, I have no right to say what God needs to do. If we don't sell our house at least we have the option to have renters and the house won't be completely empty and we can still be able to make 2 house payments. I know that there's a reason why our house hasn't sold, unfortunately I don't know that exact reason. Maybe it's so our faith in God will get stronger, or that we'll learn to rely on Him just a bit more then what we already do, I have no idea but I hope I can get an answer soon ;) I do have to say that I love the faith that Lamar has and it's so encouraging to see that too. We were talking last night and he was telling me that he has some stuff written down for his "speech" when they do the send off weekend for us. I asked him if he has anything in there about our house being sold and he said, "nope, but there's a place in there for that because I know our house will sell by then." That right there is a lot of faith and I wish I had just a bit more then what I do but Lamar is always there to encourage me right when I need it the most and that helps so much. Thanks for being such a great encouragement to your crazy wife, I love you Lamar :)