As most of you know this move has been really hard for me, I know you guys are probably thinking that I really need to suck it up and put my big girl pants on and yes, I do need to do that believe me I'm working on it. Anyway, so this morning as I was praying I felt like God is trying to show me something amazing and I can't see it because I'm so consumed with this move and what has gone along with this move, missing my friends and family, feeling like I miss out on things that are going on back in Arthur. At this point I think if God slapped me in the face with what He wants to show me, I really don't know if I would see it and that's really sad to me. Because yes, I am missing out on stuff back in Arthur but God brought us here for a reason and I'm missing out on stuff here and who knows what it could be. I could be missing out on a great friendship or meeting new people just because I'm so consumed with the move. Aaaaaaggggghhhhhh seriously I just need to get over it, we're here and there's nothing that I can do about it so I might as well live it up right? I'm tired of "feeling sorry for myself" and just being sad all the time, and I'm pretty sure that Lamar is tired of me feeling this way too. I kind of feel like I'm the EGR(extra grace required) of the church team and honestly I hate that feeling, there should always be someone crazier then me. I did tell the team on Tuesday night that I am kind of crazy so at least they know that now ;) All I want to do is suck it up, put my big girl pants on, I'm an adult and I need to act like it. I need to stop acting like a baby because if I continue to live like this then I'm definitely going to miss out on what God is trying to show me. I so want to see if but unfortunately I can't right now but someday soon I will see it and I know that it will be amamzing.